Report from Serbian 'news' website http://www.njuz.net/
WORLD ADMITS TO ANTI-SERB CONSPIRACY
NEW YORK, 8. December 2010, (Njuz) – A large number of world leaders, thinkers and religious figureheads at an extraordinary sitting of the United Nations in New York yesterday, in a joint statement, admitted of the existence of a global conspiracy against Serbs and the Serbian people.
This extraordinary act by the world’s leaders is an attempt to manage the diplomatic fallout which could arise from the revelation of confidential diplomatic cables published by WikiLeaks. Tom Cruise, who read the statement out in front of the world’s leaders, stated that for the sake of quicker conciliation between the Serbs and the whole world, it would be best that the Serbs hear now that a conspiracy exists rather than them finding out in a few months time through leaked diplomatic cables.
The statement points out that information from WikiLeaks would reveal that there is hardly any public or secret organisation not involved in a conspiracy against the Serbs. Whether it be the gay lobby, America or the Jehovah’s Witnesses, through to the Vatican and the Freemasons and all the way to the anti-smoking lobby, NATO and the Jews, all of these organisations, through their united efforts and self-interest, have for centuries attempted, and to a degree succeeded, in obstructing the freedom and uniqueness of the Serbian being.
The activities of these organisations and informal associations have primarily been geared towards making the lives of Serbia’s citizens, ever since the country’s foundation in the eight century AD, as difficult as possible. The only difference involved is that some individuals and associations, especially the six Jewish families that rule the world, act out of personal gain, while others out of malice, such as Osama bin Laden. A few organisations, such as for instance the Knights Templar and the Illuminati, have involved themselves in this conspiracy “out of the pure fun of it all”.
As we have found out off the record, the secret cables will show how in concealing the conspiracy the whole world used various means, most commonly making up events which sooner or later would ward off the suspicion of Serbian conspiracy theorists that a conspiracy exists at all. For example, in order to divert attention from the anti-Serb conspiracy, World Wars 1 and 2 were started, Kennedy was shot, the Chilean miners were stuck, the Chinese economic revolution was concocted, the Ramayana and Mahabharata epics were devised and ‘the Beatles’ was formed.
All of this and many more other events have been sufficient enough to successfully hide for thousands of years the coordinated conspiratorial activities on first glance of various activist groups such as Catholic and Muslim fundamentalists and followers of Tom Cruise, the Scientologists.
There has yet to be an official reaction from Serbia to this statement, however the Serbian Association of Conspiracy Theorists claim that this admittance “is the work of the Croats who are just waiting for the right moment to denigrate Serbia”.
NEW YORK, 8. December 2010, (Njuz) – A large number of world leaders, thinkers and religious figureheads at an extraordinary sitting of the United Nations in New York yesterday, in a joint statement, admitted of the existence of a global conspiracy against Serbs and the Serbian people.
This extraordinary act by the world’s leaders is an attempt to manage the diplomatic fallout which could arise from the revelation of confidential diplomatic cables published by WikiLeaks. Tom Cruise, who read the statement out in front of the world’s leaders, stated that for the sake of quicker conciliation between the Serbs and the whole world, it would be best that the Serbs hear now that a conspiracy exists rather than them finding out in a few months time through leaked diplomatic cables.
The statement points out that information from WikiLeaks would reveal that there is hardly any public or secret organisation not involved in a conspiracy against the Serbs. Whether it be the gay lobby, America or the Jehovah’s Witnesses, through to the Vatican and the Freemasons and all the way to the anti-smoking lobby, NATO and the Jews, all of these organisations, through their united efforts and self-interest, have for centuries attempted, and to a degree succeeded, in obstructing the freedom and uniqueness of the Serbian being.
The activities of these organisations and informal associations have primarily been geared towards making the lives of Serbia’s citizens, ever since the country’s foundation in the eight century AD, as difficult as possible. The only difference involved is that some individuals and associations, especially the six Jewish families that rule the world, act out of personal gain, while others out of malice, such as Osama bin Laden. A few organisations, such as for instance the Knights Templar and the Illuminati, have involved themselves in this conspiracy “out of the pure fun of it all”.
As we have found out off the record, the secret cables will show how in concealing the conspiracy the whole world used various means, most commonly making up events which sooner or later would ward off the suspicion of Serbian conspiracy theorists that a conspiracy exists at all. For example, in order to divert attention from the anti-Serb conspiracy, World Wars 1 and 2 were started, Kennedy was shot, the Chilean miners were stuck, the Chinese economic revolution was concocted, the Ramayana and Mahabharata epics were devised and ‘the Beatles’ was formed.
All of this and many more other events have been sufficient enough to successfully hide for thousands of years the coordinated conspiratorial activities on first glance of various activist groups such as Catholic and Muslim fundamentalists and followers of Tom Cruise, the Scientologists.
There has yet to be an official reaction from Serbia to this statement, however the Serbian Association of Conspiracy Theorists claim that this admittance “is the work of the Croats who are just waiting for the right moment to denigrate Serbia”.
By the way, http://www.njuz.net/ is a Serbian equivalent to the Onion or the Daily Mash. Scary how many Serbs (and people in the Balkans) though would believe this report. Just replace 'Serb' and 'Serbia' with 'Croat/Croatia', 'Macedonia/Macedonians', 'Bulgaria/Bulgarians', 'Greeks/Greece' etc. and whammo, instant believers.
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